These Sweet Things

Today I walked by the candy store and decided to buy candies. I went around the store to find anything that soothes my tastebuds of that moment. As I slowly look at the side of me, I stumbled upon the thing that I was looking for; jawbreakers. It was only the last pack on the shelf and it was kind of old but not expired yet. Then, I just took it. Not thinking of how bad it will taste, or not, because of its torn package. My phone rang as I walk to the cashier. It was my kid neighbor asking me if I could buy her jelly beans. I could not say no to her because I like that kid. The only problem is, I only have enough money for one type of candy. I had to let go of my jawbreakers so that I can buy her those candies. The cashier quickly took my money as if he was doing something else. As I walk to the kid's house, I kind of regreted that I was not able to buy my candy. But I said to myself that it was okay and I can probably just buy them tomorrow on the way home. I reached the house and knocked on the door. The kid answered me. I did not want to overstay at her house so I tried to just giver her her candies and the payment. She then told me that she does not want it anymore and I can have it. I gladly said thank you to her and left like in a hurry. Upon reaching my bed, I began eating the jelly beans. It tasted great at the start but as I eat more, it tasted more blander or just loosing it. I kind of got annoyed to that kid and thinking that I could be eating jawbreakers instead of these jelly beans. 

Metaphorical story.

Timeline Sucks

I have this weird thought why I hate this timeline. What I'm trying to say is, if I could have lived in a parallel universe, in which "religion" did not exist, technology could have been a thousand years advanced compared to what we have now in this life. It is just so sad knowing that in the future, many inventions could have blown our mind right now. In which we cannot see it because of our short life span. Sometimes I think that if we die, our soul lingers through out the Earth and finds a new host and in that process, your past memories are gone. But, some stays and sometimes we call it "Deja vu."

That is one thought. It is not a 100% truth but it's a theory. But I am a man of science and that all contradicts to what I just said. You see, our whole body is composed of many cells. Which in the beginning is just one cell then reproduced to many different cells. To which each cells have each purpose. I did not go to doctor school but i think that simple thing that my biology professor taught me really grew up on me. It is just simple logic which you have to connect the dots. With that in mind, our brain cells have one specific purpose. And so is our other cells like skin, etc. So it really contradicts to how one person can have a soul, thinking that one person is composed of many cells. How could it be? Could it be that we have many souls proportionate to how many our cells are? 

Sometimes I think that these kind of things is something that mediocre people should not mess with. That is why, I cannot answer this..right now.

Thoughts About Religion

Religion is a vast topic. I dont even know how long this will take me but I will try to make this post shorter than what I have in mind. First, I was baptized so I am a Catholic. But then again, I question this religion. As so many people I have met or know. Religion has been on this planet even before Jesus. Only ignorant people would question that. What is my real question then?- "Why is there religion?" 

What got me thinking about it was when I first learned about the dinosaurs. A kiddish idea but yeah. If you think about it, the Bible did not mention about them. Only the animals we saw commonly. It could be assumed that the one who wrote the Genesis lived around Earth at the time when those animals evolved already and as what we know of them today.

People who believe might tell me "Because God is out there and made us so that we have a knowledge of His existence" I just dont think that it is that simple. The major religions we know today only exists on about 4000 years ago but we all know how long we humans(homo sapiens) have lived on this planet, for approximately 150,000 years! If you think about it again, what could they have been believing at that time? There was no talk of any God. How could God do this to them too? I mean by not telling or showing He exists.

Another thing that I question is that why is there so many religions? How could there not just be one? I have been reading other blogs and posts in the internet as well. The concept "God" did not appear in the first believers of Christianity before. He was an anthropomorphic God with thunderous voice and legs to walk with in the Garden of Eden. Soon, that idea evolved in the minds of the people, around 2000 years ago, until it reached the stage of how we see God today. The Allah in the Islamic gender, who has no gender and cannot be depicted at all, in the last 1300 years. Also, humanity did not switch to the notion "One God" suddenly. 4000 years ago, the Jews were only less than a minute to the entire population, even today. It took a while for Europe to adopt the Christianity religion and the Arabs for the Islamic religion for them to have the concept "One God." Even today, the most populous country, China, do not believe in a monotheistic God. So if religion is here because of God, then God has created a peculiarly fragmentary and localized (both in space and in time) image of himself in people's minds. It's a "God with a thousand face" that appears in the world. Why?

I did not make this post to argue with believers. To them, all these questions are answered. And they preferred it that way. My purpose here is to write down how I see religion now. And soon, to add many things that i could think of. Still, this post is not enough to lay what I have in mind about religion.

May 10 Dream

Today I woke up crying because of the dream that I had. Which is unusual for me since I dont really take my dreams seriously. Well, it started when I was with my girlfriend. We took a rest on the bed. Knowing that my dad is just outside the room, I didnt closed the door entirely. I looked at the clock and it was past 12am. We both laugh, shared stories etc. Then my mom suddenly came barging in. My girlfriend and I were both shocked and she was like making excuses and crying. She said that she texted my mom about this and my mom didnt replied. Mom didnt take any excuses, even in real life, so we both didnt know what to do. She wanted our relationship to end so we did. Then I woke up, crying. At first I cant believe that it was a dream. I noticed my tears and wondered why i have them. Then I remembered my dreams and carried them all out through out the day. I went out of the room hating my mom... Epic.

 

Yea and I know why and how I got those dream. My mom dont wanting me a girlfriend is based from experience from before. And me having a girlfriend is really me wanting a girlfriend in real life.

Laughter Is Still The Best medicine

 

life is meaningless without problems.. without problems, it is like a game where you are always the winner which is pointless. i mean, why play? i know a lot of people afraid of losing. that is why they will never learn for the reason that they cannot see or appreciate what they have. we all heard it before "you learn from your mistakes." well, it is true. you do learn from your mistakes. your mind will tell you not to do the wrong things that you have done when you try to do the same thing again. i am really fascinated how the mind works and i can say that i am more interested than a psychology student. what really gets me going is the "smile." when you smile, your body releases a substance(?) called endorphin. which is what makes you happy in the first place. even when you are sad, when you try to force smile yourself, you will feel happy inside. it really contradicts if you just think about it but it works. same thing when you kiss or have an orgasm. all these makes your body release endorphins and make you feel good. which is good. which is what we all want.